and the forest would

i came up to dallas with duylinh. the old man had made a huge pot of pho. we ate a bowl each but the true flavor has to be matured overnight. that is when it will taste correct. we saw a french film by a vietnamese director called cyclo. the experience is of a true street life impovershed smearing your face with paint, blood, lizards and fish wiggling, pigs and humans their jugular briefly spraying all the same surrealist tragic in that it feels inevitable frank eroticism. tomorrow i will visit my grandmother.

i have six weeks left to live in austin. maybe in four weeks i will look at my bank account, then buy a ticket to monterrey/caracas/paris, depending on what i see. i feel drake's plasma screen/choking on air pollution in delhi dilemma. for me the dilemma is... that i have to stay always one step ahead of something that i cannot identify, only that i can fear it. though it is everywhere it is like standing water on a roadway i keep moving to keep the engine from stalling but gingerly because it may get deeper i have to find the shallowest spot but i know it is deep if it convinces me that no matter how shallow, we will all be inundated soon enough. then the dilemma is a city of bamboo lattices that may alternatingly splinter for too much weight, rot from neglect, or never built...

i get to go to an amusement park on sunday